Dir. Jordan Rubin (2014)
A group of college kids vacation at a lake populated by mutant beavers.
Quick aside: Zombeavers is my 666th review! Thanks for anyone whose read my stuff, I greatly appreciate you following along, and every single person who read my reviews is valued. Whether you're a fan or you hate my guts and every single one of my opinions, thank you for coming and staying with me in my weird little section of the internet.
I reviewed this movie a long time ago, back before I restarted the site in the last couple of years, and it was somehow lost to history. It's a damn shame, because I will sing the praises of this movie to absolutely anyone who will listen. Unfortunately, with a name like Zombeavers, the number of people willing to give it a shot is incredibly low. It's a damn shame, because it's the perfect blend of comedy, creature feature, zombie movie, and insane and disgusting gore, and it's a fantastic movie to watch during spooky season. Zombeavers is, in fact, the greatest horror movie ever made.
Ok, it's probably not the greatest horror movie ever made. But it is a supremely underrated horror comedy that needs to be seen by absolutely anyone with a pulse (and some folks without one).
Mary (Rachel Melvin), Zoe (Cortney Palm), and Jenn (Lexi Atkins) are taking a girl's vacation to the lake when they are joined by boyfriends Sam (Hutch Dano), Tommy (Jake Weary), and Buck (Peter Gilroy), who are looking to party and hook up with their girls. Little do they know, a couple of drivers (in a brilliant cameo from Bill Burr and John Mayer) carting radioactive waste has slammed into a deer and dumped a barrel of the nasty stuff into the local water supply, turning the beavers that infest the lake into monstrous zombies with the ability to... well, I'll let you find that out for yourselves when you watch, because it is a doozy.
The script, written by director Jordan Rubin and Al and Jon Kaplan (who wrote the Clown Cafe song in Terrifier 2), is perfection, hilarious from beginning to end and chock full of surprises. There's no reason that Zombeavers should be anything other than a ridiculous Syfy Channel movie or some other stupid, CGI-infused Z-level flick, but the quality of the script, the hamminess of the actors, and the impeccably executed plot elevate it far beyond what I expected to see. The beavers are ridiculous and incredibly well-made, the creature effects are phenomenal, and the gore is excessive and gruesome. It's juvenile and gross, to be sure, but it's surprisingly effective even if you're not someone who usually likes movies like this.
It's just absolutely brilliant. The first time I saw it, I watched in slack-jawed amazement at the balls of the filmmakers to make a movie like this, a completely fresh take on the tired zombie genre that was shocking brutal and laughably vulgar. There is a refinement and sophistication to the script that is practically unheard of with movies of this type, and while some of the acting is a bit cheesier than necessary at times, it's never any more ridiculous than the plot and generally works pretty well to carry the scene. It's also a short movie, running just over an hour and fifteen minutes (including the end-credits scene that is a must-see). Even if you hate it, it's not gonna take very much out of your day. And trust me, you aren't gonna hate it.
It's rare that I find a movie where I have literally no complaints. I suppose I could nitpick a couple of the CGI scenes, which are few and far between as most of the effects are practical. I could also bitch a little about some of the more juvenile bits of humor, but even those work surprisingly well. The movie is absurd on its face, but that's a big part of the charm: Zombeavers wouldn't work if there weren't, in fact, zombie beavers, and the grotesque gore is reminiscent of films with ridiculous gore like Cabin Fever and Feast.
Zombeavers is shocking good, and I sincerely hope that you give it a shot this Halloween.
Who this movie is for: Horror comedy fans, Creature feature lovers, Pelt trappers
Bottom line: I have yet to convince a single person to watch this movie, but they're missing out because it is incredible. The gore is phenomenal, the storyline is patently ridiculous and wonderful, and the script is one of the funniest (and most entertaining) that I've ever come across. Excellent performances, flawless creature effects, and even a hilarious outtakes section and post-credit scene! This is one of those rare movies that you need to watch all the way through the credits, if for no other reason than to appreciate the Zombeavers song performed by jazz singer Nick Amado as the credits roll. A nearly perfect movie from start to finish, please trust me when I tell you that you need to check this one out. And please let me know if you ever come across a Kickstarter for the inevitable sequel, Zombees!
