Dir. Joe Sherlock (2019)
Experiments from a lab break loose into the community and wreak havoc.
CAUTION: MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS
Joe Sherlock decided to try his hand at the Things “franchise,” which to be honest should not exist at all, but for some reason does. Thankfully, he’s not as inept as the folks who started the series because the first Things movie is absolutely the worst movie I’ve ever seen in my life. It’s a cult classic, but I can’t for the life of me figure out why. I really want to add a review for the original Things, but I can’t bring myself to watch it again, and I’d need to because I think I fell asleep about fifteen times on first watch. Anyway, back to Sherlock’s film.
With the same featured cast as the rest of his films, they all get slightly better at acting with each film, which is definitely a good thing but they were never worse than most B-film actors even to begin with. The film itself is the standard low-budget schlock that you get with all of Sherlock’s films, and while it’s certainly an acquired taste, it’s a lot of fun to watch and is way more entertaining than most C-list films. Things 5 is about creatures who escape from a lab, and the townspeople who must deal with this outbreak of creatures who are… monkeys? Bigfoot creatures? Ancient beavers? Well, whatever they are, they’re out for blood, specifically Oregonian townspeople blood.
Plus, this dude.
I feel like it's only fair, since this is the fifth film in the Things "series," to compare it a little bit to the original. Basically, this one is better in every way. The production value is super high comparatively, and there's a fucking plot, which is definitely a strike in the "Things 5" column. It's a very watchable film, and it's got some great creature effects as well. It's obviously limited severely by budgetary issues, but it transcends it's limited budget by being a truly interesting film with some compelling characters. Sherlock has a ton of in-jokes that somehow work despite the fact that most of the audience isn't in on it, and a lot of jokes that are shared in the Skullface Universe.
Plus, and I cannot stress this enough, lots and lots of boobs.
I’ve made no secret that I love indie films, and indie horror is without a doubt my favorite genre of indie movies. While I do think that a lot of indie films suffer from their lack of budget, Sherlock manages to keep his films on track, watchable, and well produced despite the limited budget. There is also a difference between low-budget and ultra-low-budget, and Sherlock’s films definitely fall into the latter category. This is my fifth of his films, and while I can definitely say that you can tell the budget is very limited, he does more with less than most filmmakers out there. I don’t know what his budgets are, but I can tell you that they look like they were produced with a helluva lot more than I could get my grubby little hands on. I highly recommend checking out some of his work, and I definitely look forward to seeing more from Skullface Astronaut!
As always, the behind-the-scenes shots after the movie are not to be missed. These people are having so much fun, and I had a lot of fun watching these films. Thanks so much to SA and Joe Sherlock for providing the films for review, check him out on Twitter @skullfaceastro and on Instagram @skullfaceastronaut!
Who this movie is for: Low budget connoisseurs, Fans of schlocky films, People who saw Things and desperately wanted more that wasn’t so god-awful
Bottom line: As with Sherlock’s other films, Things 5 is not held back by its low budgets and all parts of the film work together to make an enjoyable ride. The story is decent, the acting is better than decent, and the monster effects are a lot of fun. This one is more along the line of the old monster movies from the 60’s, but in color with more boobs. If you enjoy C-movies and can keep an open mind, I recommend not only Things 5 but also the whole rest of Sherlock’s Skullface Astronaut lineup.